Ninja shopping

I went shopping yesterday.

I know, I know, you probably think I'm about to start moaning bitterly again. But you'd be wrong! I actually came home with some clothes!

That's because I wasn't looking for clothes - I was food shopping.

So it got me thinking. Are there some weird clothes shopping Universal Laws at work here?

Can anyone else relate to this? ...

1. You can only be successful at clothes shopping when you are not consciously clothes shopping, and
2. You are far more likely to find clothes you like when you are accompanying a friend who is desperately looking for something and can't find anything.

I'm also wondering whether that fact that I was in a supermarket made it easier. I get so browned off in town that perhaps I'm just not in the right frame of mind to see anything nice. Hmmm, maybe I suffer from a form of shopping blindness.

Anyway, from now on it's supermarket shopping all the way. Of course if my theories are right I'll have to be quite sneaky about it so that I don't jinx things.

I'll be cool, casual. I shall invent a new form of shopping - NINJA SHOPPING! The clothes won't even see me coming!

'That'll be two cabbages, 10 satsumas, one torquoise linen top, baked beans and a pair of jeans please!'

Ha! Got you!

Shop till you drop!

Watch out Edinburgh. Inner Goddess is dragging me out shopping today.
It's likely to go something like this…

Me: Don't know why you're bothering. NOTHING EVER FITS RIGHT!

IG: You haven't even got off the bus yet so how about you drop the attitude and give it a chance?

Me (sulking): Fine, but I don't see why today will be any different. When I die and they come to carry out my corpse, I'll probably still be wearing my jeans and this b****y blue anorak. 'Wow,' they'll be saying, 'cool vintage outfit! She should be in a museum!'

IG: Stop exaggerating. There's lots of nice clothes out there, even for you! I'm confident we'll find you something.

Me: Prove it!

IG (determined): You're on!

4 hours and 15 fitting rooms later…

IG (exasperated): Now that IS lovely. No, it doesn't make you look like an explosion in a sausage factory. No, your bum is not going to black out the sun, and NO I don't think the colour could best be described as one shade lighter than slurry . Honestly, I despair. I give up. You win! Let's go home.

Me: OK, but there's just one more place I'd like to try first.

Back on the bus...

Me (vindicated!): Told you it was a total waste of time!

IG (resigned!): Not entirely. I'm just LOVING the new anorak.