Anti-social soup

I'm issuing an ASBO on the veg and bean soup recipe I tried out at the weekend.

Don't get me wrong, it was delicious and brimming with nutrients, but blimey, they can give up lobbying for wind farms and just plug me into the grid instead because today I could single-handedly power the nation.

(It's ok people, I work at home. You're safe! )

But what's it all about? Isn't weight loss hard enough without the very foods that are meant to be good for you trying to ruin the party? I can't look at a cabbage now without hearing it sneer, "EAT ME FATTY AND I'LL MAKE YOU PAY!"

What's more, why should we expect kids to grow up liking vegetables that can make them deeply unpopular? Hmm, come to think of it, maybe that's the real reason Jamie's School Dinners haven't taken off. Kids instinctively know something we adults have been far too stupid to realise: Veg =social suicide!

Well, I'm not having it. I won't be beaten into submission by a callous kidney bean or an over-superior Savoy cabbage. I will have my veg and eat it! But if I don't want to be confined to quarters for the rest of my days, I'm going to have to get a lot more strategic about who gets to party in the pot together in future.

In the meantime, as the Pythons' would say, always look on the bright side... Got any tyres that need inflated?